“Just Be Present” to Comfort a Hurting Person

The confluence of horrific news of a recent tractor/trailer and bus crash (on Canada One Highway in Manitoba and Highway 5 last week which caused 15 deaths and 10 serious injuries) with the annual Father’s Day observance on Sunday, June 18 (in which I celebrated my own father who tragically died 60 years ago in a car crash) has led me to reactivate this blog which has stood dormant for too long. I have been active on Facebook and email, however, and want to share some of my musings about this confluence as well as the wise words I received a few months ago in correspondence from an old friend from my elementary and high school years in New Rockford, North Dakota. What comfort and guidance I received from Phyllis–and what profound words to pass on to anyone who wants to comfort a hurting person – JUST BE THERE FOR THEM!

First of all, this was my Facebook post for Father’s Day:

On this 67th Father’s Day without my own father to honour, I’m thinking especially of George Wellington Moore and the 13 short years I had to enjoy being in his presence as his daughter. The loss of him in a car accident in September 1956 was the single-most tragic happening in my life. I’m grateful, though, for the many memories of the intensely loving, caring and uniquely present father he was. This newspaper clipping is the last photo my family has of him. I think he brought home at least one golf trophy a year, plus teaching my sisters and me and countless others to golf. I also cherish the two photos my mom took on New Year’s Day 1944 when Dad first introduced me to a golf course shortly after I had started walking. It was a rare snowless time in wintery Maddock, North Dakota and he just couldn’t resist hitting a few golf balls before the snow came. RIP Dad! I wonder if you’ve been golfing in heaven!

(Sorry about the lack of a copy editor for that article! The spelling makes me cringe!)

George Wellington Moore

The above two photographs my Mom took on New Year’s Day 1944 shortly after I had learned to walk, when Dad first introduced me to a golf course in Maddock, North Dakota.

My younger sister Doreen with Dad and me (circa 1954) when Dad had taken us along on a business trip from our home in New Rockford to his hometown and our birthplace, Maddock, North Dakota.

With news of the above-mentioned recent traffic accident in my mind, as well as thinking of and praying for the many families and friends of those killed and injured in that tragedy, I recalled my intense period of mourning 60 years ago after my father’s fatal car accident. As a young teenager, my biggest concern was that none of my friends were allowed by their parents to attend my dad’s funeral, which still is a big blur in my memory. However, a group of them had come over to our house after school the day after his accident and just “hung out” with me on our back steps. I don’t recall what any of them said, but I do remember the hugs, how comforting it felt to have them acknowledge my sadness and to have my peers there for me. Here is how my friend Phyllis recalled that moment in her email 60 years later:

“Your dad’s death in an auto accident was also a shock to the community.  Some of us went over to your house and sat on the steps with you.  No one could think of much to say but how sorry we were.  Good thing we didn’t know any adult platitudes.  You seemed to be pleased we were there.  I think that was the first time I realized that just being present could be a comfort to a hurting person.”

Sharing A Launch and Some Reviews of Our Latest Book: Came To Canada, Eh? Adventures of A Scottish Nomad

Gayle poses during her book launch beside a photo of her late husband Ian Moore-Morrans who was the main author of the memoir, Came To Canada, Eh? Adventures of a Scottish Nomad.

FINALLY: A BOOK LAUNCH!!!! Co-Author/Editor Gayle Moore-Morrans celebrated as she launched Moomor Publishings’ latest book on the Amenities Floor at FRED DOUGLAS PLACE, her seniors’ residence in Winnipeg, on September 10, 2021, almost 11 months after the book had first been published. Due to the restrictions of the pandemic, it had not been possible to have an in-person launch for the book until then. There was a good turnout of residents eager to hear about Gayle’s insights (some of them had already purchased and read the book in months past), an interview of Gayle as co-author/editor, a book signing/sale and a chance to watch a video of Ian reading a story from the book, plus a number of videos of him singing as a Scottish entertainer in years past. More book readings are being planned: A zoom presentation across all five Canadian time zones, sponsored by the Facebook Group LUTHERAN WOMEN CONNECTING on November 6th at 3 p.m. Central Time (plans are to record the presentation for later sharing online) and a live presentation for members of the ROBERT BURNS CLUB OF WINNIPEG on November 20th.

Gayle introduces a video sampling of Ian singing in scenes related to stories in the book.

Reviews of Came To Canada, Eh? Adventures of a Scottish Nomad, by Ian Moore-Morrans with Gayle Moore-Morrans

From James Osborne, author of Amazon #1 bestseller, The Ultimate Threat:

Came to Canada, Eh? is a brilliant and beautifully told story of the journey through life by a newcomer to Canada, at once both candidly disarming and brutally honest. This book is an important contribution to Canadian heritage.”

From Charles H. Cameron CD, Past President, Robert Burns Club of Winnipeg:

“Mr. Ian Moore-Morrans, in my humble opinion, reminds me so much of a Poet/Song writer in Scotland, each travelling the countryside in search of employment and happiness to better his life and that of his family. A paraphrase of Robert Burns’ poem, Rantin’, Rovin’ Robin could aptly describe Ian’s story: “Ian was a rovin’ boy, Rantin’, rovin’, rantin’, rovin’, Ian was a rovin’ boy, Rantin’, rovin’ Ian! He’ll hae misfortunes great an’ sma’, But ay a heart aboon them a’, He’ll be a credit till us a’ —We’ll a’ be proud o’ Ian.”

From Liz Olson, award-winning short story writer, occasional editor/copy editor and former editorial assistant for Canada Lutheran magazine: “Put down that celebrity bio and pick up Came to Canada, Eh? Ian is the real deal, the most relatable Everyman you will ever meet. Circumstances don’t allow for fame or fortune, despite his remarkable gifts, but nothing keeps this guy down for long. His indomitable spirit and quirky humour sustain him through a rollercoaster of adventures and tragedies, and the ride even leads him to a second chance at love at the end of the road. Don’t miss this!

From ARK on amazon.ca, 4 out of 5 stars:

“Never a Dull Moment. Ian’s experience as an immigrant to Canada with the attendant challenges of employment are possibly representative of the challenges faced by many immigrants now, and in times past. Ian’s experiences will likely resonate with immigrants especially, as well as with those who have felt like an ‘outsider’. Ian’s determination in the face of obstacles will be an inspiration to many readers. Very readable and enjoyable chronicle.”

By Amazon customer on amazon.ca: 4 out of 5 stars:

“Ian is a story teller. Reading the book I can hear Ian telling the stories and the book is full of his storied life. There is a chuckle on every page.”

From Pat, a Winnipeg reader and a fellow resident at author’s senior housing.  “Dear Gayle, I did enjoy reading Ian’s book “Came To Canada, Eh?” It was a hoot! But I was again struck by his unskeptical and unsuspecting manner as I earlier evidenced in his first memoir “From Poverty to Poverty: A Scotsman Encounters Canada.” As I had indicated, an alternate title might have been – “Innocents Abroad.” However, when I read the Epilogue and noted that Ian had chosen ‘honesty’ as (what he thought) his most important characteristic, it somehow all fell into place! Because he was such a generous, trustworthy person, he trusted others to be as open and honest as himself. What a guy!”

From Editorial Evaluator at Friesen Press prior to publication:

“First off, I found Ian to be an incredibly strong storyteller, very direct, down-to-earth, and relatable. His writing style is straightforward and easy to read, even when “speaking” with the Scottish burr.

     More importantly, he truly lived an extraordinary life. Although the individual moves and layoffs, for example, are fairly commonplace, when told en masse, in this sort of personal narrative, I found it incredibly impressive that he managed to maintain his hope and optimism. I can’t imagine that, in his shoes, I would have shown even a fraction of his determination.

     Overall, he is a very sympathetic and likable character, even when occasionally coming across as a bit grouchy―and I like the fact that he actually acknowledges this likelihood.

     In a personal memoir, unless one is famous, it is very important that the main “character” is compelling, likable, three-dimensional, and flawed. I never got the sense that he was painting himself as a victim or a hero. Instead, it seemed like a very honest retelling of the events that made up his Canadian experience.

     I appreciated the way he retained his connection to his Scottish roots, and found it particularly interesting when he felt the need to defend England and Queen Elizabeth from his German colleagues. When combined with the various historical facts that are shared within the narrative, I found it very impressive that he was able to put his natural Scottish biases aside in order to speak to the larger picture.

      The inclusion of his essay, “Destroy the Scots: A Brief History of the Peoples of the Highlands of Scotland and their Desperation in Trying to Exist,” really added a great deal of depth and gravitas to the narrative as a whole, and gave the reader a clearer insight into not only a historical period that most non-Scots are unaware of but into his character as well.

     His deep roots were clearly a large part of the man he was, and influenced the way he interacted with the world around him, balking at injustice, appreciating practicality, and standing strong against anything that threatened to get in his way.

     I very quickly felt like I knew him, and was enjoying following him on his various moves around the country. I also found it sort of refreshing, in an odd way, that he came across so many dishonest, unpleasant Canadians. As an editor, I have evaluated many of these sorts of stories, and in almost all of them, we Canadians are portrayed almost universally as polite, generous, kind, and so on. And on the whole, I think we are. But at times, one starts to wonder at the almost total absence of jerks. I have certainly come across plenty of those in my life, all of them born and raised in Canada. By including these negative representations, I found the story seemed somehow more real and relatable. His love of Canada, and its people are showcased as well, but in a seemingly more realistic way.

     With so many changes of setting and scenery, the pace of the narrative was good, always moving forward. It also afforded him the chance to introduce many interesting people, and does an excellent job of keeping them recognizable and individual.

     While his writing is generally very simple in style, he also showed a real knack for capturing a moment. For example (from his essay): “Even today, over 250 years later, one can feel an air of mourning that persists in Scotland’s Culloden Moor. No birds sing; no heather grows on the mounds of earth that cover the many mass graves.” One can almost feel the haunted stillness of the place. This is very good writing.

     Lastly, the organization is very effective. Largely chronological, and interspersed with pictures, poems, song lyrics, articles, and so on, as well as the lovely eulogy and epilogue. I found the narrative flowed very organically and kept my attention right through to the end, with the elements written by you, Gayle, fitting seamlessly into the story, never detracting or distracting from the rest but actually adding greatly to it.”

The Editor’s Manuscript Evaluation written for Friesen Press before publication: “A sequel to From Poverty to Poverty: A Scotsman Encounters Canada, this story follows Ian Moore-Morrans’ continuing experiences in Canada, endeavouring to survive and thrive in his new country, while facing and overcoming recurring professional and financial setbacks, as various recessions lead to lay-offs and dozens of relocations around Canada―with his wife, children, and pets―in search of new opportunities. Through all the ups and down, he and his family manage to stay positive and hopeful, overcoming the hardships, supporting each other, and always staying open to whatever life has to offer next. This story follows his personal and professional adventures through his retirement, the death of his first wife, and to his second marriage, during which he is finally able to focus his energies on singing, dancing, writing, and basically enjoying his life to its fullest until his passing in 2019.

“A Man’s A Man For A’ That” Comes to Canada, Eh?

“A Man’s A Man For A’ That” Comes to Canada, Eh?

Co-author and Editor Gayle continues to feel bad that the pandemic has prevented her from having an in-person book launch for her late husband Ian Moore-Morrans’ second memoir, Came To Canada, Eh? Adventures of a Scottish Nomad.


However, today brought some boosts to her outlook. First of all a call from Charles H. Cameron, a fellow member of the Robert Burns Club of Winnipeg, that we perhaps can soon start planning a book launch once the Burns Club can meet again for their monthly luncheon meetings, as well as giving Gayle some ideas about further promoting the book.


Then later that day she returned to her apartment and found this nice note on her shelf from a fellow resident of her senior’s high rise, (a British-born immigrant, like Ian), who had recently bought a copy of the book from Gayle.

Dear Gayle,

I did enjoy reading Ian’s book “Came To Canada, Eh?” It was a hoot! But I was again struck by his unskeptical and unsuspecting manner as I earlier evidenced [in his first memoir] “From Poverty to Poverty: A Scotsman Encounters Canada.” As I had indicated [an alternate title might have been] – “Innocents Abroad.”
However, when I read the Epilogue and noted that Ian had chosen ‘honesty’ as (what he thought) his most important characteristic, it somehow all fell into place!
Because he was such a generous, trustworthy person, he trusted others to be as open and honest as himself. What a guy!

Regards, Pat


Gayle soon replied: Thanks , dear friend, for those words. You are the first one to give me feedback on my final contribution to the book. And you got the exact purpose of that Epilogue and why I originally chose Robert Burns’ poem, “A Man’s A Man For A’ That” as the book’s epigraph. You made my day!

The first part of the above-mentioned Epilogue is quoted below:

When choosing the epigraph from Scottish poet Robert Burns (“A Man’s A Man For A’ That”) at the beginning of this book, I recalled a conversation with Ian some years ago. While creating a program about writing one’s faith journey, I thought I’d try Ian out on one of the proposed exercises by asking him to choose one word to describe the characteristic he thought most important in living his life. I had used Christian for myself and was expecting that he would choose Scottish. He surprised me though, by choosing honesty. Of course, I thought, that was Ian in a nutshell–honest! He strove throughout his life to support or protest his view that the true worth of a person (himself and others alike) is defined by honesty and independent mind rather than by class or riches or position in life. And I think this book proves it! However, it also thoroughly demonstrates that he was intrinsically Scottish and nomadic as well.

From P. 331, Came To Canada, Eh? Adventures of a Scottish Nomad, by Ian Moore-Morrans with Gayle Moore-Morrans, First Edition, 2020.

The above-mentioned Epigraph (a poem or quote to introduce the theme of a book) is quoted below, along with Ian’s added underlining of portions from this favourite Robert Burns poem as found in his well-worn copy of The Poems and Songs of Robert Burns, 1759-1796, Collins, London and Glasgow, and accompanying Glossary by James MacKenna. This underlining helped Gayle in choosing this particular poem as the book’s epigraph.


“A Man’s A Man For A’ That” An Ordinary Scotsman Shares Extraordinary Journey in Final Memoir

“A Man’s A Man For A’ That” An Ordinary Scotsman Shares Extraordinary Journey in Final Memoir

Robert Burns Day, January 25, is an appropriate time to post this recent press release. Some of Burns’ poetry as well as the Winnipeg Burns Club feature in several of the stories therein. If you haven’t got your copy yet, it’s not too late!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

PRESS RELEASE

[Winnipeg, MB – January 12, 2021] In this month of celebrating the birthday of Scotland’s bard, Robert Burns, a new memoir by a Scotsman-turned-Canadian is being celebrated. Canada is known for being a mosaic of people who have immigrated here in search of a better life. The late Scotsman, Ian Moore-Morrans, was one such immigrant. This second and newest memoir, Came To Canada, Eh? Adventures of a Scottish Nomad documents his experience, after finally overcoming poverty to settle into a life of (sometimes uncertain and chaotic) middle class prosperity in Canada.

To quote a Winnipeg reviewer: Put down that celebrity bio and pick up Came to Canada, Eh? Ian is the real deal, the most relatable Everyman you will ever meet…. His indomitable spirit and quirky humour sustain him through a rollercoaster of adventures and tragedies, and the ride even leads him to a second chance at love at the end of the road. Don’t miss this!

Came To Canada, Eh? Adventures of a Scottish Nomad by Ian Moore-Morrans with Gayle Moore-Morrans offers the story of an ordinary, yet truly extraordinary Scotsman and his endeavours to survive and thrive as an immigrant to becoming an eventual citizen in a new country – Canada. Despite facing numerous roadblocks, Ian perseveres – with enthusiasm or sometimes impulsiveness in facing new possibilities in far-flung parts of Canada, in the humour that rarely leaves him despite setbacks and encounters with less-than-honest persons, in his willingness to share his evolving talents as a musician and writer, and in his honesty and obvious love for family and constantly changing circumstances.

The full extent of Ian’s nomadic ways is both fascinating and stunning. From 1970 to 2002, Ian and his first wife Mary moved almost annually, living multiple times in six provinces (including five times in Winnipeg) within 34 years. Ian’s story also documents the two years following the death of Mary, when he encountered Gayle, the soulmate of his later life, their whirlwind romance and marriage and their decision to continue Ian’s nomadic ways as they embarked on a new adventure to Mexico.

After Ian’s death at age 86 in 2019, Gayle as editor and co-author, was able to finish Ian’s story and offer it for publication with her insights into its central theme of honesty and independence of mind as exemplified in the immortal Robert Burns’ poem, “A Man’s A Man For A’ That.”

Came To Canada, Eh? Adventures of a Scottish Nomad by Ian Moore-Morrans with Gayle Moore-Morrans (a sequel to Ian’s first memoir, From Poverty to Poverty: A Scotsman Encounters Canada), produced by Moomor Publishing through FriesenPress, is available in print and as an eBook from most major online book retailers including Amazon and the FriesenPress Bookstore. (Paperback copies are available at a special reduced price in Winnipeg by contacting Gayle directly or in Flin Flon at Tiff’s Puppy Parlour.)

About the Author
Ian Moore-Morrans, a machinist by trade, as well as a Scottish entertainer–singing and playing in bands for well over fifty years in Canada, the UK, Egypt and Mexico–and a busy husband, father and grandfather, rarely found time for writing until his early sixties. After retirement (and marrying an editor), he quickly excelled, being named one of the 50 Great Writers You Should Be Reading by THE AUTHORS SHOW in 2014. Came To Canada, Eh? Adventures of a Scottish Nomad is his fifth published book.

Gayle Moore-Morrans, Moomor Publishing
gayleian@gmail.com

MY AMERICAN-CANADIAN CHRISTMAS EVE – 2020

                                                                                                                                                                                                      

‘Twas my first COVID Christmas. My suite felt like a tomb.

Neither tree lights nor angels got rid of the gloom.

My face masks lay scattered in every direction,

Lined with filters of carbon for extra protection.

The protocol list had been followed with care,

With the odor of sanitizers filling the air.

I soon found myself almost asleep,

Counting numbers of hand washes, instead of sheep.

Then just at the time I was starting to snore,

I heard at my suite door a clamorous roar.

Though still in my pjs, I peered out in dread,

At a bearded old man who was dressed all in red.

THE GHOST OF CHRISTMASES PAST–Santa Claus

“My name is Saint Nick, and the reason I’m here,

Is your grandkids should know there’s no Christmas this year.

So Facetime Gus/Eva/Ana in Norway and say,

‘The assortment of presents that I already mailed on,

Should be saved ’til next Christmas if the virus has gone.’”

Then before I could speak, he was turning around,

Taking the elevator down with nary a sound. 

I climbed back in bed, but couldn’t sleep at all,

Because of a noise that I heard down the hall.

When I checked what it was, there was no need to ask,

Joe Biden was there with his shades and a mask.

THE GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT-US President-Elect Joe Biden

“I hear Christmas is cancelled, and your family is sad,

But here is some news, that should make you glad,

For four years our country has been in a slump,

So on January 20th, we’re going to dump Trump!

Because of this man, the whole world is grouchy,

Especially the scientist, Anthony Fauci,

Anti-maskers and vaxxers will soon sing the blues,

Because Biden is coming, and that’s not fake news.”

I tossed and I turned for the rest of the night,

After Biden, with Harris, had faded from sight,

That left me aflutter, though with nothing to fear,

But I wondered and pondered who else might appear.

THE GHOST OF CHRISTMAS YET TO COME-Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau

Then I heard a voice, saying, “It will only cause trouble,

If you get close to people who are not in your bubble.”

Keep six feet apart, to avoid germs systemic.

Don’t be an idiot; let’s defeat this pandemic.

A vaccine is coming, which should ease your frustration,

But until it arrives, practice self-isolation.

Heed Dr. Tam’s advice, it will help ease the pain,

Then your life as you knew it, will return once again”.

MY CHRISTMAS EVE WISH

Stay hopeful and healthy, this nightmare will end,

And your days can be spent with more than one friend.

Soon this darkness will vanish, replaced by the dawn,

And your memories of COVID will soon be all gone.

This grandmother is hoping next year will be bright,

So we can worship in church on a Christmas Eve night.

Now with a wink of my eye, and a twist of my head,

This American-Canadian is off to my bed!

Gayle Moore-Morrans

(with thanks to David Carter, for permission to adapt and paraphrase

his original poem: Christmas Spirits-2020.)